Warning: include_once(wp-content\plugins\wp-super-cache/wp-cache-phase1.php): failed to open stream: No such file or directory in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/advanced-cache.php on line 20

Warning: include_once(): Failed opening 'wp-content\plugins\wp-super-cache/wp-cache-phase1.php' for inclusion (include_path='.:/opt/cpanel/ea-php70/root/usr/share/pear') in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/advanced-cache.php on line 20

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads125_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 8

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads120_90_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 129

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads120_60_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 250

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads120_600_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 372

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads120_240_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 493

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads160_600_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 613

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads300_600_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 721

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads250_250_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 830

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads300_100_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 942

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; ads300_250_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-ads.php on line 1054

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_video_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-video.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_posts_list has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-posts.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_login_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-login.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_google_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-google.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_widget_tabs has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-tabbed.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_flickr_photos has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-flickr.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_author_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-author.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; author_post_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-author.php on line 68

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_social_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-social.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_search has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-search.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_slider has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-slider.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; TIE_WeatherWidget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-weather.php on line 220

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_youtube_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-youtube.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_Latest_Tweets has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-twitter.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_timeline_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-timeline.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_facebook_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-facebook.php on line 7

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_categort_posts has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-category.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_news_pic has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-news-pic.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_text_html has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-text-html.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_feedburner_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-feedburner.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_soundcloud has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-soundcloud.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_author_custom has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-author-custom.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_Author_Bio has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-custom-author.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_authors_posts has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-authors-posts.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; tie_comments_avatar has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/widgets/widget-comments-avatar.php on line 6

Deprecated: Methods with the same name as their class will not be constructors in a future version of PHP; arqam_lite_counter_widget has a deprecated constructor in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/functions/arqam-lite.php on line 736
Evde Artık Dede de Yok Nine de… – İrfana Yolculuk
Anasayfa » Bütün Yazılar » Evde Artık Dede de Yok Nine de…

Evde Artık Dede de Yok Nine de…


Notice: Undefined index: tie_hide_meta in /home/cihans5/kocar.org/wp-content/themes/sahifa/framework/parts/meta-post.php on line 3

Bir gün masallarımıza şöyle mi başlayacağız; “Bir varmış bir yokmuş, evvel zaman içinde kalbur saman içinde bir dede ile bir nine varmış.” Neden demeyin, çağımızın aile yapıları artık pederşahı olmaktan çoktan çıktı. Evlerde aile reisinin babası ve annesi olan çok az aile var. Artık evler de ona göre dizayn ediliyor. Hele büyük şehirlerde..

O, yılların edeb timsali, tecrübe yumakları ve torunları için ufuk insanlar artık yok evlerimizde. Baştan evlilik binası kurulurken hiç hesapta yoklar baba ve anne. Zaten aile de hesabını iş hayatına göre yapıyorsa artık beraber olma düşüncesi hepten rafa kalktı demektir.

b378715b0cf0ff987d437c8a234789f9

Anne baba evlat yetiştirirken temsil abidesi konumunda evlerimizin bereketi baba ve annelerimiz yok, onlarda yalnız. İşinden yorgun argın dönen aileler, akşam olunca çocuklarını ancak ya televizyonda lüzumsuz çizgi filimlerle ya da akıllı telefon veya tabletlerle oyalama yoluna gidiyorlar. Bu da ancak çocukları sağlıksız, şişman, eğitimsiz ve de kontrolsüz bir hale getiriyor. Yeni nesil dizinin dibinde büyüyeceği çınarlarını kaybetti. Sonuç ise huysuz ve yalnız büyüyen evlatlar..

Artık öyle bir algı yerleşmeye de başladı ki, kızım, oğlum rahatsız olmasın düşüncesinde baba (dede) ve anne (nine); çalışıyoruz onlara bakamayız fikrinde gelin veya damat. Maalesef herşey dünyaya göre şekilleniyor, dünya malından kazancından ödün vermemek adına gecesini gündüzüne katan

karı-koca, iş cennetleri kazanmaya ayağına gelen fırsatı elinin tersiyle itiyor. Her gün yalnız yaşayan baba ve anneler, dede ve nineler, sayıları güngeçtikçe artan huzurevlerine konan yaşlılar.. Ne büyük bir dram. Adına huzurevi denmekle huzurun gelmediği yerler ve kırık kalpler.

Şöyle çocuklarımızın dünyası için titrediğimiz kadar onların ahiretleri için de titreyebilsek ve hem onlara hem de karı-kocaya ailede hüsn-ü misal olacak yaşlı, tecrübe sahibi insanlarla beraber olsak hayatımızın şekli değişmez mi? Aile büyüklerinden tevarüs eden ölçü ve adabın kavranması ve yaşayışımızla bu güzel geleneğin devamının sağlanması bugün aile içinde dede ve ninenin varlığına ihtiyaç hissettiriyor..

Nasıl insanların bir edebi, hayâsı, iffeti varsa, evlerin de iffeti ve edebi vardır;

12102Çocuklarımıza şöyle bir bakalım,babasının, büyüklerinin karşısında edepli                     oturmayı biliyor mu?. Evde baba ve anne varken ayağını uzatıp oturuyor mu? Büyükler konuşurken söz hakkı verilmedikçe söze dâhil oluyor mu? Büyükler odaya  girdiğinde hemen toparlanıp, kalkıp onlara oturmaları için yer veriyorlar mı?

Baba sofraya oturmadan sofraya el uzatılmayacağını, babanın gelip, «Besmele»           çekerek huzurla hep beraber yemeğe başlanmayacağını..? Sonunda da sofra duâsının    yapılması gerektiğini biliyorlar mı? Evet, Hiç âilece yenen yemek kadar lezzetli yemek  olur mu? Bu sofranın edebidir.

Gelelim göstere göstere şeffaf poşetler içinde çarşı ve pazardan eve alınan yiyeceklere; Komşuların da gözü kalır hakkı geçer gibi bir düşünce verebildik mi çocuklarımıza.. Ama eskiler ne derdi, “Evladım alan var, alamayan var. Göz hakkı, kıskançlık oluyor bu yenenlerde… Hiç şifâ olur mu yavrum?” Bunu anne baba bile atlarken, evde nine ve dededen mahrum yavrulara kim verecek?

Sonra ev mahrem alandır, burada yaşananların dışarıda anlatılmaması gerektiğini verebiliyor muyuz? Yenenler, içenler, muhabbetler ve kavgalar..Ama iletişim deyip anlatmak ne ki, sosyal medya adı altında fotoğrafların bile serrişte edildiği bir toplum da edebi nasıl ve kim verecek.

Büyüklere saygıdadır evin bereketi. Evin iffeti, örtülen perdedir. Sevginin iffeti, gizliliktedir. Gözün iffeti, göz kapaklarındadır. Bedenin iffeti, tesettürdedir. Koca çınarlar artık yok, bunlar okuyarak olmuyor temsil edecek o insanlar olmayınca herşeyimiz ortaya saçıldı.

“Hayâ, utanma îmandan bir şûbedir” buyuruyor Efendimiz (s.a.s.). Bu hayayı yeni yetişen nesle örnekleriyle verecek olan da işte o şahsiyetlerdir.

Evet unuttuklarımız, ihmal ettiklerimiz veya hayatımızdan dünyalık adına çıkardıklarımız geri dönüp bize stres, dert, problem olarak yansımaktadır. Hayatta iken cenneti kazanma fırsatı olan ve de Allah’dan (c.c.) sonra en büyük hak sahipleri olarak Kur’an’da bildirilen baba ve annelerimize gelinler ve damatlar olarak sahip çıkalım, çocuklarımıza güzel örnek bu insanları hanemizin bereketine vesile kılalım.

blog.zaman.com.tr

Check Also

Ümmi Peygamber (6)

YORUM | AHMET KURUCAN Geçen haftaki yazımızı nazil olan ilk ayette “ben okuma bilmem”, hilalin görülmesi …